http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php en Tue, 13 May 2008 18:04:19 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=97 Fri, 02 May 2008 14:47:23 GMT I got my HRT bleed due this weekend and that's just how I feel!

I've bloated up like a bloody whale - all my lost lbs I'm sure must have piled back on for a couple of days. I've got spots and yukky hair.
And I felt absolutely filthy mucky :gaah:

I've had a long bubbley bath which has made me feel a bit better, sorted my hair out and made my face up a bit. My new clothes I bought last week don't feel right with me being a bloaty pig so I've put some bigger ones on and I feel half human again.

Think we might grab a takeaway for tea on the way home from Asda and then do bugger all else while I lay about and feel sorry for myself :lol: ]]> Ang http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=97 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=95 Mon, 14 Apr 2008 13:27:19 GMT and it's getting harder to get through each day, especially week days for some reason.

I just feel so heavy and miserable and numb. It's hard to feel good about anything and hard to get enthusiastic about anything. I know i should go out and do something energetic as that would help no end but to be honest, i can't make myself do it. If i could curl up in a dark corner all day, i think i probably would.

:( ]]> Copperhead http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=95 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=94 Mon, 14 Apr 2008 13:26:51 GMT which I know is down to the time of the year and so I'm just trying to work my way through it. Friday was the 4th anniversary of the day Gill died and then this Thursday would have been my sisters birthday. So I've been a grumpy pain in the neck for the last few days really. I've been here before and have no doubt I'll be here again. Probably as soon as next month which will be 16 years since we lost my mum. Apologies to anyone I might have snapped at it's not intentional. I just find it hard when I feel like this to have as much patience as I normally do when people come to me with their own problems. I can't help the way I feel and I don't like it one bit. It's awful of me but when someone moans at me that say for example they've missed their weekly night out as though it's a major major problem I'm finding it hard not to snap FFS at least you're bloody alive to have one. Not that anyone here has moaned at me about something so trivial but you know what I mean. ]]> Ang http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=94 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=93 Wed, 09 Apr 2008 10:10:06 GMT why am i so tired? why are my dreams so strange that i wake up tired? why can i not find any clothes to fit anymore? why can i never reach the end of the washing mountain? why does it always rain/sleet/hail/snow the second i step out of the office door no matter what time of day? why did my boobs have to shrink (i mean they were small befor Harry but now they are non-existant) why do i always fall asleep for the middle hour of a film only to wake up in time to watch the end? why am i confident around strangers yet too shy to call up a friend? why can i not stop scratching the excema patch on my arm and knees even though i know it will make it worse? why do our local post offices have no parking spaces nearby? and why is there no chocolate when i want some? why am i so tired?

why are my dreams so strange that i wake up tired?

why can i not find any clothes to fit anymore?

why can i never reach the end of the washing mountain?

why does it always rain/sleet/hail/snow the second i step out of the office door no matter what time of day?

why did my boobs have to shrink (i mean they were small befor Harry but now they are non-existant)

why do i always fall asleep for the middle hour of a film only to wake up in time to watch the end?

why am i confident around strangers yet too shy to call up a friend?

why can i not stop scratching the excema patch on my arm and knees even though i know it will make it worse?

why do our local post offices have no parking spaces nearby?

and why is there no chocolate when i want some? ]]> helen_adele http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=93 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=92 Wed, 02 Apr 2008 09:18:23 GMT I'm busy trying to get some facts together basically doing the sodding solicitors job.

I need to prove that tennis elbow can be caused by an impact injury - it can but in rare cases. The overall belief is it's wear and tear and trying to get a professional whose opinion counts in this whole mess is proving impossible.

My GP believes my injury is impact related. As does the physio I saw. Now this is what bugs me. The physio saw me at my worst. She told me more than once that she had only ever come up against my injuries all together as a group once before and that was in an almost identical accident. Woman banged her elbow/forearm sat in the passenger seat in a parked car at the point of impact causing tennis elbow. The woman had identical injuries to me, lower back, shoulder, neck and elbow. As both accidents were the same situation it would indicate that the accident caused both our elbow problems. Neither of us had any elbow problems before - after succesful treatment this woman never had any again. I had awful bruising under the skin that was indicative of an impact injury. All this has gone in the physios report yet for some reason the solicitors aren't releasing that report. The consultant should have seen it yet he didn't.

I remember getting my first suggested offer and thinking how odd that they made that suggestion while I was still having the physio and before seeing her report. She told me then they'll try for an early settlement without having to use that and the physio report may as well be a waste of time as in the majority of cases it doesn't get used as these days settlement is done before the physio even writes it.

I have never ever had any elbow trouble at all as my medical records have proved. I had visible bruising and swelling to my elbow and forearm that developed after the accident. I saw two people at my surgery who both said I had an impact injury. The physio said it was an impact injury.

But the doctor I saw for the initial medical report refused to ackowledge my elbow as an injury never mind impact. The consultant ackowledged it, said it was tennis elbow but because he hasn't said the magic word - impact - it's holding everything up. His report stresses the treatment I need is on my elbow but he has to say impact before they'll recognise it.

Now I'm going through NHS for my treatment but it's got to a prinicple thing now. Why should the worst injury I've had, the one that's left me unable to do so much and the one that's delayed recovery in other areas be ignored? Just because the insurers don't like to pay out on it and so it's easier not to recognise it.

I don't care if I get paid for the elbow or not. I do care that nobody who's opinion matters when making the decision is prepared to admit it can be caused by an impact injury and so I'm going to get some facts together, get a copy of the physio report and give them to the solicitor with all the relevant bits highlighted. That stupid solicitor man yesterday telling me it can only be caused by wear and tear and that's what mine is really wound me up and he really didn't like it when I told him it can be an impact injury, that the physio has come across it before from an identical accident and that it's his job to prove that to the third party insurers.

If it means they'll start trying to do their job better and not just pass every accident off as oh you've got whiplash, here's a set payment regardless of if it's healed or not it'll be worth it. ]]> Ang http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=92 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=91 Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:50:16 GMT I want to write all my frustrations down but i've tried and they just get so jumbled that it makes no sence so i will just say
grrr mother listen to me occasionally I am his mummy and i know best i even if you don't agree it will prevent him gettin upset so just let him graze and snack and don't let him get as hungry and upset as you did yesterday or i will have to stop you looking after him and i really don't what that to happen cause he loves time with you. ]]> helen_adele http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=91 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=90 Mon, 24 Mar 2008 00:27:35 GMT We have a pushy mother at the school eldest child attends.Everything your child has done hers has done first/better/faster/tidier etc.She has a group of cronies who hang on her every word, what opinions she has are the only ones worth having.

Anyhow, last sunday Father (priest father not daddy father) asked if I could repair a cloth for him.I am the mending and sewing group for our church.Not a problem but he needed it back for easter.No sweat - take two mins on sewing machine as it was a hem needing turning.Get home to a broken machine, no prob can do it by hand.Its a hem.So took it with me to childs dance class, it was pinned just needed stitching.She went to her lesson and pushy mother sticks her nose in to see what I am doing.

"Whats that you are sewing?"
"A hem"
"On what?"
"A funeral cloth"
"Where is it for?"
"Church"
"Oh"

She toddles off, comes back 5 mins later,

"What type of cloth is it?"
"A funeral cloth"
"What? like for a funeral?"
"Yep"
"Where is that used then?"
"Draped over the coffin"
"Vile"

Off she goes again and then turns

"Its not for yours is it?"
"Oh yes, I thought I might get prepared and put it away with my shroud"

She went away after that and didn't come back all night.The cloth needed a hem putting in as it was used as a back clothe for a display, not for a funeral as it is far too long for every day use, it was 18 foot by 23 foot.


Still gave me an hour of quiet. ]]> babyicebean http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=90 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=89 Sat, 22 Mar 2008 20:50:27 GMT It was my dad's anniversary yesterday (7 years), and I just couldn't let it pass without posting something. I miss him terribly - I never really understood how your heart can ache until I went thru this, even 7 years on. We visited his grave today and I just stood beside it and cried - he would hate me for doing that! I could just hear his voice in my head, and we had a conversation about Grace. That may sound slightly delirious, but I could definitely feel him near me, I know he's there. It pains me so much that he never met her, or any of his grandchildren.

Just do me a favour this weekend and cherish your loved ones, you never know when you're going to have to say goodbye :( ]]> Jen1 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=89 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=88 Mon, 17 Mar 2008 11:51:58 GMT Had a text today from a school friends to say that her daughter has arrived, slightly earlier than expected (I'm not sure exactly when she was due, I think May or June)

She weighed in at 2lb 8½oz and is apparently doing well and expected to come home if all goes to plan in May! ]]> Heather http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=88 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=87 Sat, 15 Mar 2008 13:11:49 GMT I had Emma's 2 year check yesterday with the nursery nurse who is part of our HV team! All went well, apart from not being able to get Emma weighed as she decided that moment to throw a huge strop :rofl:

She was here for 2 hours and we were chatting about everything and anything, including how I'm finding it quite difficult at the moment with Emma and having very little support from people around me etc

Next week she's going to put in a referral to Homestart to see if they can help out with what they do, and she's going to contact Ssafa and find out if there are any funds available that they can access to help out with maybe putting Emma in to creche for an extra session on top of what we can afford (1 day a week as of March 26th)

Even if only one of the 2 things happen then it'll be such a massive help, my mum was up for a few days and she's since told me she's worried about me because I look awful and I'm just so bloody tired! (To be honest she's actually told me she's worried I'm going to end up having a breakdown..... and I guess she's in a good position to see that happening with her own experiences)

So far so good today though, had a better night with Emma, 3 small wakeup cries, but no need to even think about going to see her...... so about 8 hours of slightly interrupted sleep with his masses better than 4 hours of very broken sleep on Thursday! ]]> Heather http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=87 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=86 Sat, 15 Mar 2008 07:11:22 GMT I thought i'd have a little time before Calum woke up to write a blog and maybe it'd help how i was feeling. In fact, i got up early especially to do this.

However, Calum has also decided to wake up especially early and to be honest, i can't think of how best to write this anyway - unusual for me!

Anyway - upshot is very stressed and wound up, feeling overwhelmed by everything (not emotionally if you see what i mean), lots of very disturbing dreams, totally the most unreliable employee and generally, im just walking round feeling like i am about to explode in a million different directions - physically and mentally.

I am toying with asking to be signed off work but to be honest, i don't know what good it would do.

Good news is that the clinical psychologist has signed me off, despite all that's going on! I'm turning none of this inward (in a blame/failure thing) which is a huge step forward.

Gotta go, one very impatient boy upstairs and N iall is away! ]]> Copperhead http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=86 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=85 Fri, 14 Mar 2008 21:28:40 GMT I just don't know what is going on with A any more??? He just doesn't seem to be there anymore even as a friend. I know he has alot on at the moment but he just doesn't seem to be there. I send him the odd txt to say hi and he just doesn't reply....

I'm not after anything apart from his friendship and he has told me in the past that he is there for me but why the f*ck is he not. It is totally confusing me. I do really like the guy but I'm not after anything apart from our really good friendship we had.

All this stuff with going off to australia and I want to talk to him about it all as it is a big thing and I have so much going on in my head but he's not there.

I miss him so much :( ]]> Karen http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=85 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=84 Fri, 14 Mar 2008 08:15:08 GMT I have to see the doc this morning and I'm worried sick over it. I've been awake since about 4.30 feeling sick with it all. Everyone is saying don't worry - I'd say it to them I know but it's hard not to worry really. I know what the worst can be with swollen lymph nodes and was hoping the bloods would pick up an infection but they haven't done. If it is the worst it's treatable that doesn't worry me. But a side effect of any such illness and or treatment can be that it triggers what my mum and sister had. An online friend lost his sister last year this way. She got through the illness but side effect of treatment caused this to flare up and they lost her. So I'm scared. More scared than I've ever been in my life I think.

I so hope the Dr can reassure me somewhat today and that it's just some deeper infection the bloods haven't picked up. Not knowing is bloody awful! ]]> Ang http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=84 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=83 Thu, 13 Mar 2008 17:51:48 GMT Slipped peacefully away this afternoon. Rest in peace and be happy that you are now with Grandad, which was your wish. With much love, as always XxX Slipped peacefully away this afternoon.
Rest in peace and be happy that you are now with Grandad, which was your wish.
With much love, as always XxX ]]> Mrs Mac http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=83 http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=82 Wed, 12 Mar 2008 22:15:01 GMT 3 little gallstones also turned out to be one big tumour. I will never see her again with a faceful of delight, demolishing a great big cream jammie doughnut. Hopefully, she will wait until I can get to see her on Friday and do her nails for her one last time. Sad...very, very sad. With much love, as always, to my Granny X. 3 little gallstones also turned out to be one big tumour. I will never see her again with a faceful of delight, demolishing a great big cream jammie doughnut. Hopefully, she will wait until I can get to see her on Friday and do her nails for her one last time.
Sad...very, very sad.
With much love, as always, to my Granny X. ]]> Mrs Mac http://www.mygroovywedding.com/blog.php?b=82