Help! Medical bills ruining our wedding! - Wedding Forum

babygirlh · #1 (**permalink**) 03-05-2004, 04:41 AM

FONT=Arial Narrow]Hello-
I am new to these boards but have come in search of advice!
I am 24 years old and in need of some very serious support.

My fiance and I were to be married last August-- but had some unfortunate and very ill-timed medical problems pop up on us! The week before our shower- he suffered a broken hand- which led to having to have surgery in early august! I ended up in the ER the morning OF the SHOWER with a horrible kidney infection and kidney stones! We both made it to the shower, only being able to carry on thanks to pain killers!
We postponed the wedding for a short period of time... and were then suddenly faced with the passing of my grandmother, just 2 days after Christmas. Her passing seemed to take with it my heart... literally in some ways!

Shortly after her passing, I ended up being taken to the ER for extremely low blood pressure and low heart rate. The doctors were concerned I had a stroke or a heart attack. A plethora of problems had taken over my body and I have been struggling since to keep up with daily life and Medical Bills!! , let alone planning a Wedding!

I have been to Several different doctors/specialists over the last few months-- I've had every test done that each of them could possibly come up with... and as of now, I've been told that I have Fibromyalgia, Myositis, Orthostatic Hypotension, a heart murmur, mitral valve regurgitation, severe venous pooling, sinus arrythmia, and Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome. As of yet, I have not been treated in any way for any of these conditions, although I have quite a hefty medical bill of over $4,000! (as I was recently a student and I was not able to afford health insurance)

My dilemma is this: My fiance and I had set a date for our wedding for AUGUST of this year. We had previosuly booked the church and the hall. But now, with all of the medical bills piling up- we don't see how we can pay for all of these bills, let alone have a wedding!

But there is no way out of our contract! And the contract states that we will not only lose the deposit but all of the expected revenue-- equaling close to $12,000!

I am in need of someone to talk to- I am starting to feel the heavy burdens of these disabling handicaps-- not only physically and financially, but mentally!

Things are starting to seem so hopeless at a time in my life when things should be so promising! I'm only 24!

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nikki · #2 (**permalink**) 03-05-2004, 06:28 AM

First of all, I'm so sorry that you are goign through all this - what terrible things to happen. i agree that a wedding seems a small thing to happen compared to all the medical problems you are currently facing.

Can I advis ethat you advertise your venue as available due to a cancellation? See if you can pass it on to somebody else who might be planning late? I seem to remember that a friend of mine who cancelled her wedding did that, and also Paula, who posts on here, got her deposit back when the venue hired itself out to another couple. I'm not sure of the rules in the States but surely if they can replace you they won'r be losing out?

I think it's important that you concentrate on getting well, and on working out ways to pay your bills. Can your family help? Is there some way of paying in installments? If you simply cannot pay, do they let you continue to be ill or is there some form of 'free' treatment there?

I hope you can work this out

N xxx

KM · #3 (**permalink**) 03-05-2004, 09:57 AM

Oh dear!

My heart goes out to you!

Unfortunately I'm unable to offer more than the good advice already given to you by Nikki.

You do however have my best wishes and prayers - I sincerely hope that things work out your way.

All the very best, Karen xx

Tulip · #4 (**permalink**) 03-05-2004, 10:36 AM

I'm really sorry to hear about the health problems and medical bills you've had as a result.

To lose your grandmother just after christmas must have been awful too.

Have you tried talking to the church/hall about what's happened? If not, it's probably worth giving it a go. You may find that they are sympathetic to your situation and they may be able to bend the rule. There's still time for them to fill an August slot now, so the sooner they know the more likely it is that they will help you. I know the hall is a business and needs to make money, etc, but when they hear about what's happened to you I'd certainly hope they'd do everything they could to help you out.

Nikki's suggestion also sounds good - but you'd probably better check with the hall first to make sure you can go ahead and find someone to fill your slot.

Good luck and I hope you manage to sort this out soon. I hope that your health improves very quickly too.

x

Teresa · #5 (**permalink**) 04-05-2004, 07:09 AM

What awful things to happen to you. I'm so sorry that you've had to go through all this.

Nikki's idea of seeing if you can find someone to take your place sounds like a good one and definately worth trying. Otherwise try talking to them and explaining whats happening in your life. They might be sympathetic.

I really hope you get it all sorted. Big hugs to you.

Teresa xx