Should I stay or should I go? - Wedding Forum

Toria · #1 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:15 AM

Hi

Can anyone give me feedback (again)? I'm having 2 bms, both of whom live in Norwich (I'm in Oxford). We chose the dresses together, and their first fitting is scheduled for the 29th August. I had originally wanted to be there, but this is a work day and I have a) no holiday left, what with wedding and everything; and b) a really really important appt. that evening, which means I'll probably not be able to get there and back in time. Even if I did just go quickly, it's about 4 hours there and back.

Part of me wants to trust my mum, who'll be there, and the BMs themselves to oversee everything, as I know what the dresses look like and am confident that there won't be any major hiccups. The other part thinks I should be there as I am, after all, the bride. What should I do? The thought of taking a day sick (as it would be) rushing to Norwich and back in a record time, etc, is quite stressing me out, but then again, maybe I should go...

HELP! I can't make decisions any more!!

T x:confused:

Taz · #2 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:20 AM

I myself would want to be there if i could but if i was unable to then i would trust my mum to help me or CBM!

Jo · #3 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:25 AM

I would trust them and not go. My best friend is my CBM and I would be confident she would make sure everything is okay at the fitting and deal with any problems.

Could they take some photos for you so at least you can get an idea of what they looked like?

xxx

Bianca · #4 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:27 AM

I agree with Cupid. I would really like to go, but if I couldn't I'd be happy for them to go with my mum.

It sounds as though you'd have real problems going - I am sure they would be ok without you.

Why not ask them to take a camera so they can take photos and you can see?

Bianca · #5 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:29 AM

Quote:

Could they take some photos for you so at least you can get an idea of what they looked like?

Snap Mrs M To Be!

Toria · #6 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:44 AM

Didn't think of that - that's a great idea! Thank you!
[relieved icon]. I do really want to be there, but that's sort of outweighed by the sheer stress of getting there...

Again, thanks!

T x

SusieQ · #7 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 10:45 AM

Trust them Toria. I'm assuming they're not tiny tots then they should know what looks good on them etc especially if you have already chosen the dresses and it is just a fitting.

The photo idea is a good one though!

Susie
xxx

mistleuk · #8 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 11:01 AM

i'd trust them, but get them to take a picture

cathgamble · #9 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 11:11 AM

I would want to be there, but given the circumstances I would trust them to go on their own. My BM ended up buying a dress without me there, and I will not be seeing it before the wedding!!

Catherine xxx

karenl · #10 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 12:45 PM

I concur with the above !! Driving to Norwich from Oxford and back in a day is sheer madness!

K xx

*Jo* · #11 (**permalink**) 14-08-2002, 01:29 PM

I think with all you've got going on that day anyway, there's no point putting extra stress on yourself. As it's just a fitting rather than a "choosing", I think you'll be fine to leave them to it. As everyone's already suggested, you can get them to take pics for you to put your mind at rest - maybe they could do a polaroid and post it to you so you get it soon, or if they've got one, they could use a digital camera then email you the photo..? It might help put your mind at rest anyway...

Jo

Lynne · #12 (**permalink**) 15-08-2002, 03:28 AM

i agree with the others, i havent even seem my bms in their dresses and wont till a week before the wedding. I trust them tho so i am sure they will be fine

Toria · #13 (**permalink**) 15-08-2002, 05:08 AM

Thanks guys. I really wanted to take the pressure off myself a bit by giving myself permission not to go, and the photos idea is excellent. Am feeling considerably less stressed now, and will contact my CBM today to ensure that she knows and understands - though she's pretty easy-going, and I'm sure she will.

T x