still called mrs.? (moan) - Wedding Forum

bounce · #1 (**permalink**) 16-09-2002, 02:16 PM

sorry, this is just a moan more than anything, but wondering how many other people think that a divorced women keeping the Mrs. title is off?
my h2b's ex. changed her name to double-barrelled w. h2b's name & her maiden name, then changed her mind & went back to just h2b's name a couple of months later.
i understand her keeping h2b's name as it is also children's name, but it really bugs me that she still calls herself a mrs. (petty, i know!)
she left him, has not been married for two years now, & i hate, hate, hate the idea that she will be mrs. h. when i will be.
i know i have no control over this, but to me, this makes no sense.
should she not be a ms. h??
i can't call myself Dr. so & so, because i'm not a doctor, so how can a woman who is not married call herself a mrs?

i know that there are more important things in the world to worry about, i know it's petty & trivial, just wondering if it annoys any other b2bs??

on a lighter note, she told the children when she changed her name, & again when she changed it back, so 1 of them says her name is n. smith-jones (ok, made up!) & the other argues back that her name is n. smith! they could argue about it for hours if we let them

keeps me amused

Lo · #2 (**permalink**) 16-09-2002, 05:16 PM

My mum left my dad 9 years ago and she's still a Mrs. Well, after 25 years together, why should she change it? A friend of mine who recently got divorced changed her's to Ms. I think it's personal preference.

However, I know it pisses my dad's current wife off, but she's torn our family apart (long story, they met after my parents seperated, and as she had her own kids, kicked me and my brother out and we hardly see my dad now - sorry, whinge over!)

What you have to remember is that your h2b has decided to marry YOU, and he wants you to have his name!!! You could always have a double barreled name, that way you won't be the same as her ? Just a thought!!

Just ignore me, I haven't been through this except myself, only through my parents!!

Lo xxx

nikki · #3 (**permalink**) 16-09-2002, 05:37 PM

My mum is even worse - she kept her second husband's name cos she just could not be bothered changing it again!

I know it's annoying, but usually the Statement thing is if a woman changes it back to her maiden name - she has probably kept his cos she can't be bothered changing again!

Chin up - you'll be the REAL one!!!!!

N xxx

bounce · #4 (**permalink**) 17-09-2002, 12:23 PM

thanks for your replies ladies!
the surname bit doesn't really bother me, although it wasn't through laziness, she changed it to double-barrelled & then back again!
i just can't imagine why she would still want to be known as mrs., she can't stand h2b & they were only married 3 1/2 yrs!

i have no insecurities about how h2b feels about me, just think that mrs. is a honourable title to have, & makes a statement about who you are.

Taz · #5 (**permalink**) 17-09-2002, 01:47 PM

I have to say that i was in the same boat but she got married in April so changed her name first! but i was fed up with her being the Ex but still being Mrs R...

Very annoying!